PHYLLIS SMITH: Wendy, you have such an interesting story in the journey that you had. You have a formula for living the ultimate fulfilled life and there are 3 L’s:
To Live: really live and enjoy life
To Love: you alluded earlier how your son taught you truly about unconditional love
To Lead: to step up and step out of your box and make a difference in the world
Let’s start first with To Live, to enjoy life. Well that’s easy to say. What is one thing you can tell people right now - how does one enjoy their life? What is one thing a person can do starting today?
WENDY DARLING: The reason Live comes first in that formula is, especially for women - men too - but we must learn to really put ourselves first and care for ourselves. It was very foolish of me to go on that trip to fulfill an obligation as sick as I was. Self-care is very critical for everybody. I know it’s spoken of a lot, but getting rest and really taking time for you whatever that might be. I have a morning ritual that I almost all the time fulfill where I have a practice of gratitude. I do my own healing work first thing in the morning, and I spend time in quiet and listen to the whispers of my heart and get my marching orders for the day. I really have cultivated that, because I feel that when we really get in touch with our inner guidance system life could not be sweeter. When you feel that you have the whole universe at your back it’s kind of cool.
PHYLLIS SMITH: Yeah. You say you help put people in the driver’s seat. Because so often, especially entrepreneurs. We might have a family we come home to. Someone might be listening to this right now and might be saying, "I have no time." What do you say to them?
WENDY DARLING: I say that’s ridiculous. You make the time. When I was married and had a young child my responsibilities where huge. I literally put me first. So, on my calendar I scheduled time for me, and I also scheduled time to not schedule anything. I know that might sound funny, but I was a planner, so I literally had time that was just for me - especially if you have all those responsibilities. I tell clients you make agreements with your family that this is my time, and unless somebody is dying, the house is on fire, there’s an earthquake, or a natural disaster of some kind, under no circumstances are you to bother me. I think you must create agreements and set those boundaries. As you know, for those of us who are entrepreneurs, the work is never done, ever. That to-do list is a forever generating gift. It keeps on giving.
PHYLLIS SMITH: Right.
WENDY DARLING: So, to really know when you’re going to start and when you stop. I encourage you to make sure that you keep your work separate from the rest of your life. I happen to work out of my home. I have a designated area, and I don’t go into that designated area after a certain time in my day. So that’s the Live part.
Then for some of us, me included, you need to schedule fun. Too often we get way too involved in our work, and we start taking ourselves a little too seriously, and I think to make sure to have fun. Now fun for a lot of people is different. To me, fun is connecting to my friends. The people that matter to me most - and yes maybe do this or that on occasion - but that’s what’s fun for me. So, figure that out, and if you don’t know what that is, if you don’t know what will nourish you and replenish you, start talking to other people to get ideas, because we need to put our oxygen masks on first.